


Into My Arms

by twokisses



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Canon Era, Coming Out, Friendship, M/M, Relationship Reveal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-04
Updated: 2019-12-04
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:09:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21672010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twokisses/pseuds/twokisses
Summary: At the Leavers Ball, Niall and Dev find out about Baz's relationship with Simon, and have a much-needed heart-to-heart with him about it.
Relationships: Dev & Niall & Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Dev & Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Comments: 30
Kudos: 227
Collections: Carry On Countdown 2019





	Into My Arms

**Author's Note:**

> written for the carry on countdown 2019, day 10: side characters.
> 
> i had a lot of fun writing this - the dialogue between baz and niall and dev just came very easily for me. hope you enjoy!

Niall's never claimed to be a good dancer, but he's trying, for the sake of his date. 

She's a beast on the dance floor. Frizzy hair flying, hips swaying. Her name is Olivia, and he's had a crush on her since they were first partnered in Magic Words five years ago.

"This song is amazing!" she says, loudly, so she can be heard over the bass that's thudding through Niall's bones like a heartbeat. They're dancing right in front of the speakers, over in one corner of the stone patio where half of Watford's student population is bopping around. Everyone's properly decked out for the night, since the Leavers Ball is their only excuse to do so all year, and Niall feels slightly blinded by all the sequins and shoe-shine. He keeps his eyes on Liv instead and nods vigorously in reply to her. (He doesn't feel like wrecking his vocal chords in an attempt to be heard.) She laughs and spins into his arms, and Niall lets her guide him, trusting her to move him in a way that looks decent.

The song hits its final note a few minutes later. Liv is covered in a sheen of sweat, and her eyes are bright with pleasure. "I need a drink," she pants.

Niall says, "I'll get one for you," and her smile becomes brighter than he thought was possible.

"You're a gem, Niall." She pecks his cheek. "I'm going to talk to Keris for a bit. Find me later!" Niall nods dumbly (he's going to be thinking of that kiss for the rest of the night) and watches her walk away from him.

A punch table has been set up against one of the rails that section the patio off from the lawn. As Niall is walking towards it, the next song comes on, and the mood changes. There's no bass in this one, or popping beats - just the lonely notes of a piano stringing out a tune Niall recognises, but can't name. Baz had it playing in his house once when Niall visited. Niall called it boring, and Baz changed it.

Apparently, enough people have a differing opinion to him to make a crowd, because more dancers are moving to the floor than away from it. Niall ignores them. He'll worry about the song if Liv wants to dance to it.

He's reached the punch table and acquired two plastic cups by the time a deep, somber voice begins singing over the piano: 

_ I don't believe in an interventionist God _

_ But I know, darling, that you do _

_ Boring,  _ Niall thinks, pleased that his taste hasn't changed, and lets the music blur into background noise as he begins scooping something green and fizzy from the punchbowl into the cups. But it's not a moment later that his calm is disrupted, when he feels someone move hurriedly into the space by his side. It's fully broken when Dev says,

"Niall, what the  _ fuck _ ?"

Niall looks up, and is taken aback by the whole array of emotions on Dev's face - incredulity, confusion, something vaguely like horror. "What?" Niall asks.

"What the fuck is Baz doing with Snow?"

_ Snow? _ Niall frowns. Snow isn't even here. Or he wasn't. Niall turns, eyes searching the dance floor, looking for a head of toffee-brown hair. He finds it in a minute. Its owner (who is, indeed, Simon Snow) is swaying gently on the other side of the dance floor, leaning close to someone…

Niall freezes.

_ Baz? _

_ Into my arms,  _ Nick Cave sings, longing and hopeful.

It  _ is _ Baz, with Snow. On the opposite edge of the floor, holding him. His arm is around Snow's middle, and Snow's hand is in his. They're swaying, and they're so close to each other - talking, quietly. Looking into each other's eyes. 

It's the perfect picture of a couple at a school dance, but Niall can't make sense of it.

"Did you know about this?" Dev asks, waving his hand wildly at the scene in front of them, as if Niall hasn't already seen it. Niall snatches his wrist from the air and pushes it down.

_ "No,"  _ Niall says. He's still staring.

"Well, apparently neither did anyone else!" Dev hisses back. That makes Niall divert his gaze (though it's a miracle that he manages it), and he briefly takes note of the reactions of the rest of the people present. It's a whole study in the spectrum of shock and disbelief. The teachers, especially, look dumbfounded - Niall wonders if they're going to catch flies, with how wide open their mouths are. The students' faces have a bit more variety of expression. Some just look shocked, as if the sight is still computing. Some look pleasantly surprised. Others look absolutely disgusted, and they're not trying to hide it. Niall looks away, back to Baz. And Snow. And he watches, along with everyone else.

_ And I don't believe in the existence of angels _

_ But looking at you, I wonder if that's true _

Baz and Snow may be dancing to a ballad, but it doesn’t look particularly peaceful. They’re talking, but Snow is frowning, and shaking his head. Baz appears to be saying everything in earnest. At some point, he lets go of Snow, who’s all hunched up in a defensive position, and Niall wonders if there’s going to be a scene right there, in the middle of the ball. If a fist-fight is going to break out. He kind of hopes it will - at least that would make some sense.

But nothing comes of it. Baz pulls Snow back into his arms ( _ Into my arms, O lord, _ Cave continues, incessant) and they talk, and sway, and talk, and sway.

And then Snow is kissing Baz, and Baz is kissing him back.

Niall looks away as quickly as he can. Dev, he sees, has done the same.

_ “Fuck,” _ Niall says, under his breath. 

“Yeah,” Dev says in agreement.

-

Baz and Snow leave the dance floor shortly after that. Niall wants to go after them, wants so badly to wring Baz by the collar and demand to know what the hell is going on, but Olivia intercepts him before he can.

“Did you see that?” she asks. Her eyes are as big as moons. “Did you see Basil and Simon together? Did you know about them?”

By the time Niall has given her his answers ( _ Yes, who didn’t? No, absolutely not),  _ Baz has disappeared with Snow. Dev’s date comes over as well, squeaking the same things Olivia just did, and Niall resigns himself to a fate of ignorance and frustration. He can’t imagine that Baz will come back to the ball after this, and he doesn’t know when he’ll be able to see him face-to-face again. He doesn’t want to confront Baz about this over the phone.

But by some miracle, he does get his chance. Later, as the halls are clearing out and everyone is milling around in little groups, waiting for their rides and making plans to meet up. Niall steps out of the ballroom with Olivia on his arm and Dev behind him with his own date, and sees Baz leaning against the far wall, further down towards the toilets. He must be waiting for Snow.

Niall moves his free arm back to nudge Dev, who says, “Yeah” and then, to his date, “Hey, me and Niall are gonna talk to Baz for a while…” Niall turns to Liv, who waves her hand at him before he can even say anything.

“I know,” she says, smiling. “Go talk to him. I’ll wait by the doors.” So saying, she unhooks her arm from Niall’s, gives it a little squeeze, then walks off with Dev’s date towards the entrance. Niall huffs out a breath, half-wishing he could skip this entire conversation, then turns back to Baz. He’s noticed them by now. He raises an eyebrow, slowly, like a question, and inclines his head towards them.

“Come on,” Niall mutters to Dev, and they make their way over. 

But when they get there, and Baz is right in front of them - pushing off the wall, hands in his pockets, eyeing them with something like wariness - neither of them says anything. Niall doesn’t know what happened to all his words - his questions, his accusations. They were clamouring in his throat earlier, fighting for first place. Now they’re quiet, stuck behind Niall’s teeth. He tries to chew them and spit them out, but nothing is going.

Baz, after a long, long moment, says, “Boys.” The way he used to. When the three of them were still perfectly at ease, on each other’s wavelength. It’s been a while since that, of course - and Baz’s becoming friends with Snow was the main reason for it. (Well, more than friends, as they now know.) “I’m assuming you have questions,” Baz continues, slowly. He waits, but they’re still mute. “Or, you  _ had _ them… Unless you - ”

“You’re gay?”

At least something made its way out of Niall’s throat. He doesn’t know if it was the right question to open with, but he can’t even begin to sort the things he wants to say by priority. They all seem urgent. Everything has been turned upside down.

Baz looks at him evenly. “Yes,” he says. He doesn’t falter, and he says it clearly, with no hint of shame.

Niall takes a deep breath. Dev asks, “Why didn’t you tell us?”

Baz’s dark gaze switches over to Dev, and he draws himself to his full height, lifting his chin. “Why do you think?”

“You didn’t know how we’d take it,” Niall says. 

Baz nods, once.

Niall and Dev are quiet. Niall doesn’t know how he’s taking it, yet. And he doesn’t want to say something at this moment that he doesn’t really mean. 

So instead he asks, “Why  _ Snow _ ?” because that’s safer, and he also desperately wants to know.

Baz raises an eyebrow. “I didn’t exactly get to decide. If I had, I definitely would have made a more convenient choice.”

“When?” Dev asks. “I mean, since when?” It takes Niall a moment to understand that he’s switched track.

But Baz doesn’t even hesitate. “Fifth year,” he says.

“Fuck, Baz,” Niall says. “You were a nightmare about Snow that year.”

“I wasn’t taking the realisation very well,” Baz says, like he’s talking about his report card instead of a revelation that made him take multiple attempts at Snow’s wellbeing. Most of which involved Niall’s and Dev’s unflinching support.

“Yeah,” Dev mutters. “No shit.”

And then a silence falls, and they seem to realise that there’s nothing left to say.  _ What else is there?  _ Niall thinks, staring at Baz, wondering if he’s seeing him differently now. If all the news he’s just received has changed the colour of the lens he views Baz through. Does it matter that he likes boys? It might have, if Niall didn’t know for sure that he was with Snow. And on that note, does it matter if Baz is with him? Has Simon Snow ever been Niall’s enemy? Niall has never thought about that before. He was always just Baz’s friend, on Baz’s side. Maybe Snow was just his enemy by proxy.

Niall looks at Baz, really looks at him as he is, and comes to several conclusions: he’s a snarky bastard, that’s for sure. And a pompous jerk. And also a friend Niall’s had since he was 11 and a complete idiot (though both Baz and Dev would argue that he still is). No matter what Baz has done, he’s always been there for Niall. To Niall’s side, Dev seems to have come to a similar realisation, because he snorts out a quiet laugh. Niall sees the surprise on Baz’s face at that, unfiltered and genuine - it’s the most vulnerable he’s ever looked in front of them.

Dev is having a full-on guffaw now. “You fucktard,” he says. Which Niall thinks is appropriate.

Baz’s surprise is wearing away, and his eyebrow is lifting off again, which is always a sign of a return to normal. “What did you just call me?”

“A mentally-challenged wanker,” Niall supplies. Then clarifies, “Not because you’re gay. Just because you are one, generally. And because trying to kill someone is apparently your way of flirting. Does that always work?”

Baz’s smile is a small and cautious thing at the corner of his mouth. “I wouldn’t know. I’ve only tried it once.”

“You’ve never tried flirting with anyone before Snow?"

“I wasn’t interested in anyone before him.”

“Crowley, you sad fuck.”

Niall is laughing now too. Baz is shaking his head. “Why are the two of you more okay with this than when you thought Snow and I were just friends?”

“Because now we know you didn’t do it to be an arsehole,” Dev says. “You’re just hopeless.”

“Ah, that makes sense," Baz says dryly. "Thank you.”

Niall says, “Snow’s been waiting in the toilets, hasn’t he?”

“Obviously,” Dev says. Then, “We could lock him in there.”

Baz gives him a look.

“No? Nevermind.”

“Niall! Dev!” It’s Olivia, from further up the hall. She’s waving at them. “I’m sorry, we really need to get going!”

“Gotta blast,” Niall says. He salutes Baz, who returns the gesture. Dev punches him on the arm. “Bring drinks on Tuesday, yeah? My parents are on holiday.”

“What trouble is on the menu this time?”

“Just the usual. And hey, Baz.” Niall is already walking away with Dev, but he turns a last time, and pushes through the awkwardness he feels. “You know… really. We don’t care. About what you are. Or that you’re with Snow. It’s nothing.” 

Dev bobs his head in agreement. Baz’s jaw shifts - clenching and unclenching a few times. He’s only a few steps away from Niall and Dev, but he’s squinting at them. 

When he finally speaks, it’s just to say, “Thank you.” Or maybe that’s all he can manage.

It’s more than enough.

**Author's Note:**

> for more of my snowbaz content (and older fics), head over to my tumblr, @sbazzing!


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